D4D (Offline)

• Level 10
• Salina, Kansas, United States
• 10 year ago

The Old ♥♥♥♥♥♥ Still Has It (Kind Of) https://www.faceit.com/en/players/D4D Bio: Warning: salty old man alert! When I'm not busy yelling at kids to get off my lawn or drinking beer on the couch, I'm getting my ass handed to me in CS:GO by 12-year-old tryhards. My sons are my teammates, but let's be real, they're just here to carry me to victory and listen to me ♥♥♥♥♥ about how much better I was at Quake back in the day.Favorite Games: Counter-Strike: Global Offensive (where I die more than a ♥♥♥♥♥♥' noob), Team Fortress 2 (because who doesn't love a good ol' fashioned spy stab and some quality trash talk?), and whatever other games my sons are playing so I can ♥♥♥♥ on their gaming skills.Status: Currently trying to figure out how to use the microphone without sounding like a complete ♥♥♥♥♥♥, getting roasted by kids in chat, and wondering why my sons won't play video games with me anymore because "Dad's being too toxic".Quotes:"♥♥♥♥ you, kid! I've been gaming longer than you've been alive!""What's with all these new-fangled smokes? In my day, we just used to throw grenades and hope for the best... or just run around like headless chickens while screaming '♥♥♥♥ YOU' at the top of our lungs.""Son, can you please explain this 'eSports' thingy to me? Is it like professional bowling... but with more Mountain Dew and Cheeto dust?"Game Highlights:That one time I got a kill... with the enemy team's bomb... while screaming "I'M THE KING OF THIS ♥♥♥♥!".When my son finally taught me how to use the recoil control thingy... and I still managed to miss every shot while yelling "♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ AIM ASSIST!"The epic "Dad Rages Against the Machine" incident where I threw my mouse across the room because I got killed by a pixel... again.Friend me if you want to experience the thrill of playing with someone who still thinks they're good at video games despite being completely washed up! Just don't expect any mercy – or decent gameplay – from this old ♥♥♥♥♥♥.